(This article is written in the first person, so this is from the perspective of the volleyball that is stuck at the top of the Karcher Center.)
Hi, I’m Vivi, the volleyball that is stuck at the top of the Karcher Center ceiling, looking down on all of you peasants. This is day 3,165, which is exactly 8 years and 8 months. That’s how long I have been trapped up here for. As I sit looking down on the Rosary Royals every day, I begin to remember how great my life was before someone decided to absolutely shank me up to the top of the ceiling. I was one of the best volleyballs in town, and NOW I’M STUCK FOREVER, never to be used again.
I miss my friends. They are probably having a grand ole time hanging out in the volleyball cart that is stored in that one random closet with the best ice. Not going to lie, I would take some of that pebble ice right now. Hey! Volleyballs can have ice too. I was the life of the party, man! Now all I do is watch people pass by. *Fake cries* No one even knows how long I have been up here! I could have been up here for months or even years. I’m soooooooooooooooo lonely. *Side eyes us*
HOLD ON! WAIT A MINUTE! THERE ARE TWO MORE VOLLEYBALLS THAT DECIDED TO JOIN ME! Now it’s three of us, and still no one has tried to get us down. Honestly, they seem pretty nice. One of them said his name is Wilbert and the other said her name was Vophia. Respectfully what kind of name is that… I think they like each other! NOOO GET THEM DOWN! I don’t want to hear some cheesy compliments that they give each other or them trying to fight over who loves the other more. Disgusting. Anyways might as well become friends with them.
No one has even tried to get me down. I have seen Danielle Thiemann ‘28 look up at me a few times during volleyball practice in the Fall. I can tell by her eyes that she feels sorry for me. Dani said to me one day, “How’s the weather up there?” I honestly just wanted to fall onto her at that point. Rude.
I have seen countless sports rallies and many, and I mean MANY, long Masses. Honestly, I’m the holiest thing at Rosary. I don’t remember any other Rosary objects listening to one of Father Ian‘s amazing homilies. Rallies are a mess. I don’t even want to talk about them, but I must. These games that you guys always play during these rallies make me chuckle if I’m going to be honest. It’s my only time I ever laugh. OOO! I do love to eavesdrop on all of your guys’ conversations during indoor lunch though. I like to get to know everyone.
Sophomore Chloe Ryan and junior Brigid LeVecke have both looked at me multiple times while running suicides during basketball practice. I feel really bad for the basketball team because they run so much. “I’m honestly kind of confused on how Vivi got stuck up there. #skills to whoever shanked her up there. Why has no one ever tried to get her down? Poor Vivi,” said Choe.
Hands down, I really miss the class of 2021. You may be wondering why, but this is because the freshmen class, who graduated in 2021, were the only girls trying to get me down. 2017 was ages ago… Julianna LeVecke ‘21 told her little sister, Brigid LeVecke, “When I went to Rosary, a volleyball, who now has a name I guess, got stuck in the Karcher Center’s rafters. She got stuck during my freshman year there. Rosary girls would throw other balls at her, shoes, and even rogue water bottles. But with no success. Over time, people stopped trying, but no one ever forgot. She became a part of the gym, almost like a memorial. It never came down throughout my four years at Rosary. It’s been eight years since she’s gotten stuck, I pray she’s still there. Such a beautiful, unspoken tradition.”
I’m starting to get emotional. Please someone send help and get us down from here, especially me. I don’t know how many more years I can stay up here for. Please tell Mr. Julian to come get me down, please. SOS. XOXO Vivi the volleyball that’s stuck at the top of the Karcher Center ceiling.
