Lent, from the perspective of a teenage girl

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A Lenten display outside the chapel. (Photo Credit: Elena Walz)

Elena Walz, Editor-in-Chief

My experience with Lent has honestly not always been the most fulfilling. As a kid, I would always “give up” the same things: cookies, my favorite snacks, chocolate, etc. I guess doing these things was important, but I never really understood why. It basically was just a challenge to see how long I could go without eating something, but at the same time having the expectation that I would just pig out on Easter Sunday.

Then, as I grew older, my perception of Lent began to change. I started hearing things from people about how I was allowed to skip out on my Lenten sacrifice on Sundays. My focus switched from sacrificing something for the sake of acknowledging the people who have less than me to a goal associated with weight loss and body image. Neither of these benefitted my spiritual life in any way and I completely lost sight of the purpose of devoting an entire liturgical season to prayer, fasting, and almsgiving.

I know that a big reason why I felt so unaffected by Lent was that I warped it into a time for focusing on egotism, which is why I am so grateful that last year my Lenten experience changed my life. By the grace of God, I was given strength to overcome a huge vice on March 5 of last year. This was about midway through Lent and I had spent most of those 40 days overwhelmed with guilt.

Last year, I chose to pray a daily Rosary as my Lenten sacrifice. This was completely different from anything I had done before because it made me actually spend time with God instead of spending time thinking about myself. On the morning of March 5, I was driving home with my Rosary going, and I could not help but feel that I was unworthy of the prayer. The way I had been living my life seemed to directly contradict the promise I made to God on Ash Wednesday, and I resolved to turn myself around.

Since then, I have discovered new love for my faith. The daily Rosaries I started last year have become an essential part of my morning routine not just during Lent, but every day. I participate more fully in the sacraments and look to the Eucharist with more reverence than ever before. I feel more confident in my prayer life, my relationship with my parents, and my relationship with myself. With how well last year’s Lent ended for me, I was very eager to see the new heights I could reach this year.

This year’s Lenten season has made me acutely aware of two things: 1) I have so much to be grateful for and 2) I have the attention span of a toddler. I have had several moments over the past couple weeks when I just cannot stop smiling and I know it is all because of God. Just last week, I was sitting in a pew next to my grandma and I felt an enormous wave of joy wash over me. How could I not immediately offer a prayer of thanksgiving to my Creator who made that joy possible? On the flip side however, my determination to deepen my prayer life showed me that my ability to focus on God needs some work.

I start every day by saying good morning to God and offering up a few intentions about literally anything that crosses my mind. Increasingly, I’ve been praying for the ability to focus my mind and heart on God when I spend time with Him. More often than not, I have to jolt myself back into focus during Mass, Holy Hour, or even my daily Rosaries. My ultimate goal for this Lenten season is to overcome the temptation to let my mind wander.

As far as my sacrifice, I decided to focus again on something more physical, but in a different way than I have previously done. I resolved to only shower in cold water for the duration of Lent. As a swimmer, I come home each evening with cold, thoroughly chlorinated hair, and one of my most comforting moments is standing in the shower with hot water beating down on my tired body. I knew it would be a bit of a rough transition, but I am proud to say that I have stuck with my promise and plan to continue showering in cold water after Lent, the same way I continued my habit of praying the Rosary.

In addition, to feed my spiritual life, I started doing weekly calls with the boy I’m dating to discuss anything from apologetics to the relationship between love, sacrifice and trust. It has been such a great learning experience because he challenges me to consider my relationship with him under the same light I think about Christ’s Passion and death.

I can establish a clear line of causation between Lent and the place my spiritual life is now. Had it not been for God’s intervention over a year ago, I might still be too lost and scared to seek out the help I needed. Though I know my faith is not something that has a definite end goal, I am confident that the path I am currently on will lead to a closer relationship to God, Mary, and the saints, thereby giving me the courage to overcome the temptations I face for the rest of Lent and beyond.